By Angela Walker Franklin | President and CEO, Des Moines University 

In our fast-paced, overly scheduled lives, we often find ourselves running from one thing to the next with very little time in between. We work full days with commitments to many afternoon and evening events as well. I also find it unusual to have a free weekend, the time when most people would have the opportunity to relax and recharge for the next week.

Having such a constant, demanding work schedule can take a toll, increasing stress and anxiety, with worries of being able to get it all done. I often describe this scenario as juggling more balls than we should and being afraid of dropping any one. It is the nature of the business that many of us are in with little opportunity to change.

What we can change, however, is the approach we take to nurture and care for ourselves as we are meeting the demands of our many job responsibilities. Making time for work, family and friends seems to come first, second and third, and if there is any time left over, then we “pencil ourselves in” as No. 4. Perhaps like me, you tend to go and go, being mindful that you must take care of everything else first. 

After years of working in a demanding career, I accept the fact that my lifestyle may be compromised because of work responsibilities. However, when I get the time to pencil myself in, I take full advantage of the time to relax, relate and release. I call this my decompressing time … as I work to unwind, release the pressure, and make a conscious decision to clear and relax my mind.

So here are my tips for the decompression:

1. Give yourself permission to take care of yourself. So many of us feel guilty for taking time for ourselves as if we are not worthy. You earned the right to be supportive of your own health and well-being.

2. Schedule “me time” as often as possible given your life circumstances. Me time may be quiet time reading a favorite book, a long soak in the tub or a scheduled getaway. Plan it and relish in the opportunity to love yourself.

3. Identify the stressors in your life and make a deliberate effort to plan for mitigating and navigating through the stressors. Stressful situations are inevitable. How we process and manage through them are skills to be learned. Learning calming techniques and reflective positive attributions can make a difference.

4. Learn to let go, vent, talk it out, then leave it behind. Find your sounding board. It may be a faithful friend, a significant other, a trained therapist, minister or other professional. Sharing your thoughts, releasing pent-up emotions and leaving them behind is the ultimate approach to cathartic release.

5. Learn how to relax. Consider yoga, massage, curling up with a good book, napping, relaxing on the beach, boat riding, staring at the mountains, steaming in a hot tub, etc. Find your thing and do it often.

6. Remember you should be your own best friend. Take good care of yourself. You are worth it and you earned the right to be just a bit selfish. Decompress as needed and make no excuses or apologies.

Angela Franklin, Ph.D, is the 15th president of Des Moines University, a 118-year-old health sciences university. She is a native of McCormick, S.C., a member of Phi Beta Kappa and a 1981 magna cum laude graduate of Furman University, a small liberal arts college in Greenville, S.C. A licensed clinical psychologist, she completed her Ph.D. in clinical psychology at Emory University, followed by a yearlong clinical internship at Grady Memorial Hospital. Contact her viaemail.