It didn’t bother me when a highly scientific survey in North Korea found that China is the happiest nation on Earth. North Korea narrowly lost out on the top spot when a shortage of badminton birdies ruined several major holidays, and Cuba, Iran and Venezuela rounded out the top five. The United States finished last in a 203-way race.

Good for them, I thought. Maybe repressive dictatorships have gotten a bad rap, and in November 2012 I just might vote for the candidate who reminds me the most of Kim Jong Il. If only Michele Bachmann could put on a little weight.

As for America’s lackluster showing in the survey, it’s probably just a temporary thing. If the National Football League settles its labor dispute before fall, I’m sure we can pull ahead of Afghanistan in happiness. And if the weather ever straightens out, we might even give Sudan a run for its money.

But then came a CNBC report about the very opposite kind of ranking, the Misery Index, and once again America looked like the kind of place you would visit only to see Mount Rushmore, and then it’s straight back to Yemen. The index adds the unemployment and inflation rates, and this spring it sat at a 28-year high of 12.7. The figure was “under double digits from June 1993 through May 2008.”

That’s when I started trying to remember the last time things seemed “pretty good,” and couldn’t. But then, I also can’t remember where I put my computer keyboard, so no big deal. Oh, wait – I guess it’s right here.

Finally, President Obama addressed the nation and stated for the record something that has been only rumored up until now: This has been one lousy decade.

That was hard to hear. You only get a few decades, so you hate to write one off entirely. I don’t remember much about my first one, and I’m not expecting great things near the end, so I was counting on the middle part to be OK.

But from Sept. 11, 2001, onward, life has been like a long bus ride with a talkative expert on soil tilth. The dot-com crash, wars, Enron, Hurricane Katrina, bad winters, the BP oil spill, countless political embarrassments, a global financial meltdown, a sixth “Rocky” movie. Given the choice between living the decade over again or taking a semester of organic chemistry – well, you would probably choose the decade, but only to relive the hours spent popping bubble wrap.

Still, there’s another way to look at this issue. Former president of the American Pyschological Association Martin Seligman has decided that happiness is overrated. He wrote a book titled “Authentic Happiness” in 2002, but after slogging through the ensuing years, he took a more realistic tack in “Flourish.”

The idea behind this book is that mindless giggling is not an achievable goal, at least not after middle school; instead, the best way to feel satisfied is to have solid personal relationships and believe that you’re accomplishing something worthwhile.

Takes some of the pressure off, doesn’t it? Sure, you’ll always be envious of the people in TV commercials, who clearly are having more fun than you ever will. But focus on your well-being, check off a completed task every day, and you’ll be fine. It won’t produce ecstasy, but at least your first waking thought every morning doesn’t have to be: “Oh, God. Not again.”

Also, stop telling yourself that childhood represented the zenith of your happiness, because it probably wasn’t all that great, either.

Notice that when you see little kids, more often than not they’re being dragged around by grim-faced parents, and they’re not exactly radiating joy. They’re whining or sobbing, the very picture of misery. They appear to feel like … well, you know, like the way you feel when you have to postpone a vacation trip to North Korea.

Jim Pollock is the managing editor of the Des Moines Business Record. He can be reached by email at jimpollock@bpcdm.com